CLICK HERE FOR BLOGGER TEMPLATES AND MYSPACE LAYOUTS »

Sunday, September 28, 2008

I'm sorry...

Another day, another day life. Another life is taken away and another life is born. Why is this world so boring? If not something is destroyed, then somewhere is in danger. Every different thing happen in daily life but there is nothing that is so interesting. I want to be a pilot, I want to be an artist, I want to be a singer and more. All those just normal people dreams. But what is my dream? I know I said b4 that I want to be the world famous pianist, but is that really my dream or is it just a dream that was plant in my head since young. I don’t know anymore, I just don’t feel like bother anyone about me. Everyone seem to have their own problem. Haiz…I just don’t know anymore. Just give up? Just go with the flow? But where is the freedom in anything? Where am I sippose to smile and laugh if it is not what I like? I don’t really think I doing the right thing anymore. The more I grow up, pieaces of me starts to fade…the longer I live, the more I’m acting not like me anymore. Until the day I loose myself, all I can say I’m sorry for all the thing I do….

Should I act forever?

Nothing really change in my life. I’m still the old me, who goes around smilling. The pain I’m having inside could never stop bleeding. I smile in pain but no one notice. I talk happily, avoiding people noticing me. But am I doing the right thing? Am I suppose to hide away my pain? I smile to shake away my pain. I laugh and have fun to chase those pain away. But everytime the night come, alone in my dark room. Those pain just burst out from me. I curled like a ball and cover myself up. Crying and sobbing my tears away. I hate the sun rise because I know have to be happy again. Those anyone in this world know the real me. I help people, I’m just like any other kids but I just cant help it. Maybe the pressure had push me to the end. Maybe I’m just different, I don’t really know anymore. Am I going to just smile forever? Am I going to act forever? Or should I really show the real me? Ah!! I don even know who is the really me!!!!

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Black Prince

you were called the white prince
and the famous quaterback in school
your dashing eyes staed into mine
those beautiful eyes
shakespears was right
love doesn't need a reason
i was not popular
and was always bullied
then one day you called
to the prom just me and you
i dressed up beautifully
waiting for your arrival
you held a rose and kiss my hand
i know i'm in heaven
you took me into the hall
my heart pound even faster
as you smile
but cold dashing water fell from above
the smell of rotten eggs
laughther filled the room
your evil grin woke me up
a slap on the face and the fantasy is gone
no longer a white prince
but a black prinve instead
i'll never forget that
cold heart of yours
that i'll crush one day...

Friday, September 19, 2008

i'm me!!!

There isn’t anything I could do… but my whole world came to and end in one second. Everything look perfectly fine in people’s eyes. But what to you really think? Parents should know everything about their child. But in my life…I don’t know anyone who could understand my feeling. Everything they see is the happy me. They will never understand my feeling. Could there be anyone in this world who can see through me? I try to make them to see who I really am but even my parents couldn’t understand! All they do is blame me. All they think is about themselves. What is it the real me? When can I be me? Do I have to act forever? A life to furfil other people dreams. Do I have to cry to let you see I’m sad? Do I have to be angry to let you see I’m in no mood? Why can’t anyone see me for who I am? Is it really hard to understand me? Am I not good enough to be seen? Stop making me like someone else! Stop comparing me with someone else! Stop calling my name but see me as someone else! I’m not him! I not like him! I’m not smart, I’m not strong, I’m not that happy like him! Please see me for who I am! Please see me as me and not the person you wish to be in me...